I’m 24 years old, I’ve never had a job like you’ve had – if you don’t count petty theft, a failed attempt at drug dealing, moving contraband in jail and the odd jobs I now do to mostly kill time. From the tender age of 15 I was a whore and I stopped when I was 22. If I keep managing my money as well as I have I actually never would need to work again, even if I spent far more than I do now the money, investments and real estate would keep me very well for at least a few decades. Where I motivated by wealth I could find a nice upwardly mobile man, marry him, spit out a brat or two and join my peers at the gym and for Saturday brunch at Brighton beach, clearly I don’t feel that motivation. I’d rather go back to being a whore actually.
So I have been applying for such work as a non-uni but very well passed VCE student might get. I am phenomenally fast on a keyboard, and well spoken, well presented, good-humoured and I know how to ingratiate myself to strangers. I have a pleasant, refined accent, just don’t ask me to sing I’m fabulously tone-deaf and will probably damage your ears.
I haven’t had a great deal of luck especially living in butt fuck no-where central Victoria, I do stack up quite well against the local breed of females but a winning smile and a firm arse will only go so far when you are asked – “So do you have any experience?”
Not a lot that doesn’t include entertaining men no.
Bona Dea has smiled on her wayward daughter though and I have myself a casual job manning (womaning?) the phones, calling announcements and shuffling casual workers at a mill in a close by town – which the locals insist is a city. Who’d I have to fuck – well no one, strange as it seems to me, I remember eyeing off three other ‘girls’ as the lady called us and thinking, one is plain but passable – but I bet they all have credible history, me, well best not ask really, unless you want to see what I can do in the executive relief department?
I wonder how they fucked up the interview now, much more than how I managed not to fuck for the job. I’m nervous, laugh if you must, I’m not nervous meeting a stranger, seducing him and what not but the idea of 8 hours of things that normal people do – what do normal people do?
Life, it seems to me is largely winging it, make things up as you go, act like you know what you are doing, experiment and eventually you will know. Or have someone teach you, which I hope they do. So I decided I should try what ever it is you people do during the day, you know get a job? Beats trying to occupy myself from dawn till dusk.
Obviously I’ve spent most of the day picking an outfit, several actually, too dressy? Too young? Too much like I will put out? If only mother could see me now, harlot to “Good morning Scarlet speaking how may I help you?”
“As private parts to the gods are we! They play with us for their sport.”
Lord Melchett, Chains, Black Adder II